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"Sex is the consolation you have when you can't have love." Gabriel García Márquez "Sex is great until you die but it's never as great as it was when you were a kid, when it was a mystery.".


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You just left, and I already miss you! First song on the radio, and it reminds me of you. I got you a one-way ticket…to my heart. You mentioned you like bed and breakfasts. I'll bring the bed.


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You're so hot, my zipper is falling for you. They say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me? I'm on top of things. Would you like to be one of them? Are you an eco-friendly kind of girl? The condom in my pocket goes expires tomorrow, so why don't you help me use it?


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1. "There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it." ―Mindy Kaling 2. "Life is short. Drive fast and leave a sexy corpse. That's one of my mottos." —Stanley Hudson, The.


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70+ Dirty, Funny, and Best Rizz Lines. Lim How Wei. August 1, 2023. Lim How Wei notlhw. Rizz is a word that was invented by Kai Cenat, a YouTuber, and a Twitch streamer. It's similar to the word, "Game", which means that you're confident and persuasive enough to attract the opposite sex. Rizz is about having good confidence and charisma.


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"I don't need a runway to show off my super sexy self." "I may not have the height of a supermodel, but my sex appeal is off the charts." "Supermodels may have the spotlight, but I've got the real star quality." "Who needs to be a supermodel when you're super sexy in your own skin?"


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"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella. What's the difference between a job and marriage? A job still sucks after 10 years. If you were born in September, it's pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a bang.


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100 Funny Love Quotes From Comedians That Describe Your Crazy Relationship Because love is funny-strange, but it's also funny ha-ha. By YourTango — Written on Nov 12, 2021 Photo:.


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Sexy sayings and quotes. We present 100 funny and possibly useful quotes about love from 100 comedians. Sex is not the answer yes is the answer shortcuts cut life short the future is shaped by your dreams so stop wasting time and go to sleep funny good morning quotes and wishes.


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You can ridicule an idea that someone holds without hurting them. Ricky Gervais. Sex is like money; only too much is enough. John Updike. Software is like sex: it's better when it's free. Linus Torvalds. My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive. Rodney Dangerfield. Sex is emotion in motion.


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1. "He's definitely thirsty tonight." Image: Giphy 2. "That teabag was actually better the second time around." Related story A Cursed List of Bad Pickup Lines to Make You Cringe (& Laugh Too).


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"Sex is like a bridge game; if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand." — Mae West Funny Sexy Quotes On Self Assured Women: "Confidence is the sexiest thing a woman can have. It's much sexier than any body part" Aimee Mullins "Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got."-Sophia Loren


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Aside from a few… inclinations. This might be odd at first for newer partners: People have different comfort levels with their kinky habits: When you accidentally view their Amazon product recommendations: Things can be quite different as a grown-up: Sometimes, your more vanilla partner (s) might be a bit scared to try something new.


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1. "Loretta, I love you. Not like they told you love is, and I didn't know this either, love don't make things nice — it ruins everything. It breaks your heart. It makes things a mess. We.


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Sex and the City. "The good ones screw you, the bad ones screw you, and the rest don't know how to screw you." -- Samantha Jones (Kim Cattrall) Want more? Head on over to TooFab to LOL at the rest of these hilarious Top 20 Sex Comedy Quotes. 7 Subtle Signs a Marriage Is in Some Serious Trouble.


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That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.". —Jack Handey. 6. Bob: "Looks like you've been missing a lot of work lately.". Peter: "I wouldn.